This week has seen my old friend anxiety trying to assert its dominance over me. With the sad news about my friend and so many celebrities dying this year, my health anxiety has been very active.
It might seem silly that these events should cause such worry, but a real feeling of doom has fallen upon me like a veil and my anxiety is gripping my throat and making me shake. I know that there is no logical reason for me to feel this way, but I can’t shake the impending death feeling that I have at the moment.
I also have self doubt to add to my torment at the moment. Doubting if this blog is worth it, if the podcast is a good idea, if my videos really help. All this is designed to make me give up, but I know that it is the anxiety and I am determined to keep going.
Maybe that is what comes from living with this for so long. It still controls me sometimes, but I know a lot of its tricks. I can often talk myself out of anxiety if I really concentrate.
So I am going to continue to fight and do all the things that I want to do. I am not looking for fame or fortune from blogging, I just want to help myself and others. If I can do that and give at least one person a hand, then it will be worth it for me.