This time of years brings good and bad feelings for me. On the one hand, I love the frosty fresh mornings like we had today. The type of morning when you can feel your lungs being frozen solid just from breathing.
It also brings that perennial delight that is the Starbucks Egg Nog Latte. I think I go on a bit about the marvellous concoctions that they create, but it is my only guilty pleasure.
Unfortunately, there are also downsides for me which I am sure I have touched on before. Germs, bugs, viruses, plagues, anything of that nature immediately rings alarm bells in my mind.
There is no rational thought behind it, but then if it was rational, then it wouldn’t be a problem.
In a cruel twist, although the seasons are technically the same length, the winter months seem to take twice as long to pass for me.
I have just published a new podcast on Podcasts.com
It is only a short podcast on this occasion, as I just wanted to introduce myself and make sure everything was ok. Please have a listen and subscribe for more in the future.
I have been doing some housework on my blog site and found all these comments you have kindly left that I hadn’t seen.
For some reason, it wasn’t alerting me to them even though I have set it to do so. So I am very sorry for not replying to those comments. It’s not because I am a grumpy old sod, just because I hadn’t seen them.
Thank you for commenting and I hope you continue to do so, they give me a real insight into what people like and also lets me know that there is someone reading all this stuff!
I never really intended to write popular articles or stories, I just wanted a way to get all the thoughts and feelings out of my mind. This blog has enabled me to do just that, so if it helps or entertains anyone else, that is even better.
Sometimes, in fact not as often as it could, my anxiety will suddenly rise to ridiculous levels for no reason what so ever.
It goes without saying that I don’t particularly like these days. Today was like this, in fact, I am still feeling the after effects.
It makes me feel really awful which is worse when I have no explanation to try and reason with. I sometimes think my anxiety does this on purpose just to prove a very vicious point.
It doesn’t just affect my mood, or also alters my outlook on things. I go from looking forward to something, to wishing it wasn’t approaching. My tasks and to-do list suddenly become the most difficult things in the world.
To someone looking in from the outside, it must look like I am either miserable or just disinterested. This is not the case at all, in fact, its the exact opposite.
Needless to say, the countermeasures have been out in force today and will be on stand-by for the evening.
Anxiety Level 9
They say that pet therapy is good for lowering blood pressure and relaxing you. I have found that about out new kittens. They really relax me even when I’m not playing with them.
I have loved having kittens around since we used to foster them a few years ago. These two are particularly cute.
Today is the second rainy day we have had, nothing unusual in the UK, but with torrential rain last night and all day today, the local river is ready to burst its banks.
Now, to be honest, the river does this every time there is a shower, but this time it is very bad. The local ducks are lining up to swim to Sainsbury’s for their seeds and lattes.
It reminds me of The Great Flood of 2016 which was also this year, just a bit earlier. The coach part floods leaving tourists wading through the leaves and ankle-deep water.
In some ways, I am looking forward to it, because then I can Periscope it!
In other news, the Coca-Cola lorry has been spotted in Kent. This usually means a flood of children to the local shopping centre, eager to get their drinks and goodies.
It has become something of a tradition here, although I wasn’t able to see it last year. I am hoping to be able to get there this time.
My anxiety has been up and down since the last check-in. Today was a bit wobbly this afternoon, but I did have more coffee than I should. At least the Coca-Cola lorry is coming!
Anxiety Level 7
I decided to take my dog Amber over to the countryside for a walk today. Storm Angus was still having a good blow and there were puddles everywhere.
This was recorded on Periscope, to see me live check out my Periscope Channel.
This is the top 5 android games that I have been using in 2016. They are great for letting off some steam and distracting the anxious mind.
You can also see my other videos on my Youtube Channel.
Just when you thought it was safe to go outside, I have a bad day. All that cockiness about me not having much anxiety in yesterday’s journal entry
We today was one of those niggling, anxious days that left me with anxious feelings all day. They are so draining, it was lucky that I didn’t have to go anywhere today.
On a side note, as someone with anxiety and who could probably be quite superstitious if they put their mind to it, are we worried that this is journal number 13?
I even walked the dog in an attempt to stem my worry, but it didn’t work. Although trying to build an underground system with my daughter in Minecraft did use a lot of nervous energy. I consider myself to be the Isambard Kingdom Brunel of Minecraft when it comes to building transport and bridges.
Maybe I should have numbered this journal 12A?